Whether you’ve been through a bad break up or you’re reading a sympathy card, the old saying, “Time heals everything,” gets passed around whenever someone is suffering. But as a therapist, I see first-hand how damaging that belief can be.
The false notion that time equals medicine is a common misconception I tackle in my therapy office. Individuals seeking help often say, “I shouldn’t still be feeling this bad.” It might be a year after a painful divorce, or two years after the loss of a loved one, and they’re frustrated that they’re still struggling.
In fact, many of them still feel as though their loss happened yesterday. They have difficulty talking about their experience, and when they do, their pain is palpable.
Quite often, their ongoing anguish stems from their attempts to escape heartache. Rather than deal with their grief or confront their sadness, they attempted to distract themselves from their misery.