If Buddha Gave Dating Tips

On the spiritual path, the dating tips or “rules” are surprisingly simple.

Ever wondered what it would be like to have the ancient wisdom of the Buddha to guide you through the dating process? If the Buddha Dated: A Handbook for Finding Love on a Spiritual Path by Charlotte Kasl, PhD, has been beloved by relationship-seekers ever since it was published in 1999.

Thing is, if the Buddha did give dating tips, they might be a little confusing to the modern-day man. Consider this your Top 10 CliffsNotes, each with modern day explanations.

  • “When you say goodbye to someone or decide not to see them again, remember you are a moment in their story. Make it a story that doesn’t leave a scar.” Translation: Do whatever it takes to leave on good terms.
  • “Equality doesn’t need to mean that both people earn the same amount of money, have equal status, or are equally good looking. It means they value each other as equals when it comes to making plans, making love or making decisions. They have an equal voice. One does not sacrifice himself, or herself, to the other.” Translation: Equality is not based on statistics. Equality is based on shared values, shared communication and shared self-respect. 
  • “In an unequal relationship, because the subordinate mate acquiesces and complies, the dominant one is never challenged to reflect on him- or herself. There is little or no growth, flexibility, or melting into the shared heart—no forming of the “us” bond that brings two people into spiritual union.” Translation: In equal relationships both people are challenged to grow and evolve together, rather than one person always pushing for the other partner’s growth.
  • “Things are always changing—our thoughts, cells, hormones, hairline, consciousness, relationship, and the landscape around us. Instead of trying to freeze the present moment and hanging onto it, we need to remember that life is a process of constantly letting go.” Translation: The only constant is change. Every present moment is a chance to embrace the newness and let go of the past. 

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